Wednesday, October 6, 2010

THE UNEXPRESSIVE INDIANS..



It’s been long since blogging. As I posted earlier my mom had been unwell, and yes I was very tensed these last few weeks….the situation at home is pretty ok now thanks to all your wishes.

These few weeks me and my dad are attending college and office respectively on alternative days, since we can’t leave my mother home alone. Thus either of us had to stay home. I don’t mind missing college but we have a lot of attendance issues in our college so I have to go.  Today I came back early.. our classes had been suspended because of the death of the formal principle of our college (may she rest in peace) as I came back early I could stay and my father could  run to his work . Mother was asleep in the afternoon.. so I switched on the television.. it had been a really long time since I had watched television in afternoon … as of my college and tuition.

I sat and watched a rerun of “Koffee With Karan”, it’s basically a chat show.. in which karan (a hot shot Indian film director) calls celbs for a coffee and has a     te`te` - a - te`te` with them.. this episode’s guest was Richard Gere.
Umm.. so he was not here to talk about his movies or bollywood for a matter of fact bit his main focus was on the socio-economic demography of India and of his causes such as fighting against AIDS etc. in india

He pointed one really strong point…
“ Indians are not some one who speaks their mind.. they are scared, for whatever reasons”…

 He so, nailed it.. right on bull’s eye! We all say it’s our culture .. that we are not supposed to question our elders and blah blah blah stuff bull shit ….. actually we Indians lack the skill of expression infact Today’s generation is considered manner less.. as most of them speak back to their elders .
 I remember, when I was in school I had certain friends who made regular trips to the principle’s office for the wrong reasons.. sometimes they were called even if it was not their fault and brutally scolded just for the fact that she(my principle) thought that they were trying to cause trouble. They had gaven me  “gyan”(lesson) that if I ever come around such situation (which I did a few times) “never speak back”  even if you are not guilty, if you try explaining or spoke back things can get worse  like suspension and parents being unnecessarily called and harassed . I was sometimes called for silly thing too but I followed their teachings and yes I was saved.
The same situation prevails  in my college too.. but then I was a kid and now I am an adult, I don’t like to be called and scolded for silly things such as not wearing my ID  card etc. but I can’t say or do anything just listen say sorry and leave silently pretending I am sorry when I don’t really care…the circumstances make me hypocrite and which is not who I am..!!

We are not allowed to speak anything against the rules or authority and that applies to almost all of India.. My father’s take on this, “what can you expect from a country which has been almost enslaved for 200 years by Britishers and before that by Arabs and tughulaqs.”


India’s expression is still regaining though at a very slow rate. The divorce rates have risen in India as women are now retaliating against domestic and any such injustice done against them. Gay people are asking for their rights... even some males are coming forward with their complaint against molestation done to them... by females at higher authority…
Even Da vinci actually never said anything but his work and art said it all, that was one clever way of expression though he did got into trouble… but we all can’t  and are not like him…even he never really achieved so to say anything much, in his life time  for his genius work, he was somebody who thought ahead of his time and thus unaccepted.
Even Mira bai, the  female saint who fell in love with lord Krishna, was one of a hell society rule breaker. It’s said that lord Krishna had appeared to her or in real words gave her darshan ie, met her . she really went through a lot only for the love of lord..
Gandhi ji went to jail for creating salt(the famous dandi march) . 
But we are simple, average human beings not Gandhi, Mira bai or vinci for that matter.

The most difficult but the most guaranteed path for success is “being yourself in the world” as easy as it sounds it’s much more difficult esp. for those who are different. I think we all are different in some way or other but it’s just that some of us express our self some just stay back. A proper communication is essentially important for the success in any work...

The emphasis on this issue is becoming a more important case to be thought... but till then I and many other people like me will have to remain hypocrites.
  

6 comments:

anewtycoon said...

very well said... questioning is an art that the people of India need to learn... it is our right and duty to challenge the authorities justice and humanity...

Maitrey said...

Yeah, agree wid you! maitaining courteousy before elders turn us into an unexpressive, stoned character of the society which steers our way to hatred and dis lack of frank communication create nd' amplify a term which prevaied with dominance in recent years in India i.e. Generation Gap....ask from those parents which are here in India wid their son/daughter overseas or somewhere...under what they go through?....My perception says 90% of them just console with few 'formal' calls in a month....ALL COZ WE UNEXPRESSIVE INDIANS WHICH THRASHES N CONDEMN EXPESSIVE ONES
well! Anki, your blog inputs exhibit smthn which seems not a big deal to concern but lies beneath n make the devils of society to respire.....Great Going buddy!!

Ayak said...

Excellent post Anki. Lets hope that things change for the better and that everyone becomes entitled to freedom of speech and expession.

rummuser said...

I disagree totally with you dear. The problem is not what you identify but totally different. It is now what one says that is important but how one says whatever that needs to be said. What Indians lack is the skill to be able to communicate effectively without being offensive. I have personally come across these issues as a son, parent, boss, colleague, elder etc and more than ever convinced about my understanding of this. What needs to be done is to teach our young people how to effectively communicate without sounding either rebellious or discourteous or rude.

gaelikaa said...

Rummuser, the trouble in Indian culture is, as you very well know, that if you disagree with an elder, but it your parent, husband(?) or in-laws you are automatically classed as 'baadtamiz' (undisciplined) and no one will listen to you. Effective communication is possible only when listeniing as well as speaking happens.

@Anki - nice post dear. I have an award for you over at 'gaelikaa's diary'....

anki said...

@shubo and linda thanyou ur right

@maitrey you are so right bro.. well written "stoned characters" brilliant approach

now the two brother and sister... both of you are right. there is a need 2 learn effective communication but,a communication is effective when both the parties listen to each other without any issues which does not happen in india, some elders just shun away kids saying you are a kid,

a teenager is more interested in watching mtv @ home rather sitting with their parents because his parents never sat with him/her when they were a kid...